Continuing Saga of Online Dating Part III

N4

Well I must say N4 who I will refer to as baby boy because he is 9 years 3 months younger than the cougar,  seems to be interested, he came dancing Friday January 13th and brought a friend who's approval he was seeking, little did he know that I had my own friend there to see if she approved.  His friend really put me through the paces, I almost felt like he was hitting on me.  It's seemed he liked a woman with nice legs, skirt and heels and the cougar is known for her lethal legs, what did one young guy call them there that night....that he thought those legs were illegal.

It turned out to be a very interesting evening, pulling my baby boy in front of me a few times to stop the advances of his friend who I think was testing me.  At one point, his friend is butt dancing against mine, so I ask one of my girlfriends to slip in my place, my girlfriend has a large beautiful booty and I chuckle as he realizes that it's not me he's rubbing his butt up a against.  Towards the end of the night, here I was kissing my baby boy  like a school girl.  He wasn't driving that evening so he is indulging in the beer and  I think abit egged on by his friend my guy tries to nonchalantly put his hand under my skirt.  I promptly remove it and tell him that it is not the appropriate place, and beside the bartender is watching the antics.  With all this excitment my resistance wearing down, I decide it's time for me to head out of there and on home, without baby boy.  I have decided this year, a man will pursue me, but needs to get to really know me before I let him under my skirts.

My friend has approved of him, but like me thought his friend was pushing him thinking he would get lucky, but I was not budging from the new me this year.  He texts me the next morning saying he was sorry that he was a bad boy, I tell him I do like bad boys, but I want him to get to know me first before sex comes into the equation.  Since this is now Tuesday, January 17 and he is still calling me, I guess it's okay with him.  The trust in his motives seems to be pure for now.  I also asked if his friend approved of me and he said of course, his friend liked me, couldn't I tell.  I told him I figured that, and thought sometimes he was a little to fresh with me, and a little disrespectful of baby boy, but he said he has known him for years and knows he was just joking, so I let it go.

On Sunday night we talk on the phone for almost 50 mins, I tell him I would like to get to know him and ask if he would let me, he tells me yes he will, a good indication that he is serious about pursuing me.  I have already hidden my profile on the dating site, and haven't had one desire to check it out since the day after I met baby boy.

N4 is so good looking with muscles on his arms, something this cougar always liked on a man, I just can't get over that point, so this Friday January 20th, my favorite band is playing at my favorite place.  Its Tuesday and I tell him so, he promptly texts back that he will meet me there.  A good indication, he is serious about a relationship of some sorts, but this cougar will be moving very slowly, she was burnt recently and will not allow her heart to be put back into that position again.

Even though I will be moving this thing slowly, this guy is definitely one that I feel could mingle very well with my circle of friends, he is so outgoing, kind and considerate, a real breathe of fresh air from the serious, negative grumpy men I've dated in the past.  I can honestly say I'm would be proud to walk down the mall with a look at everyone saying look who I'm with.

It is Thursday January 19th and after an interesting confession by baby boy, the cougar is back on the prowl.  Although not seriously until after a vacation down to Phoenix in March.  Baby boy met a woman on New Years Eve that he was intrigued with and she gave him his number.  He sent a text to her but it didn't go through, through a friend she had where he worked she was able to send him an email.  He needed to tell me that, because he was interested in her and I really have to commend him as most men would have just walked away without an explanation.  As it turned out I know this girl, small world, I told him it was okay because I was letting him pursue me and wasn't totally vested in a relationship with him.  Deep down inside I was thinking he really is a nice guy, but there was always something playing in the back of my mind that he was too nice, and not a strong type that this cougar needs.  Besides the cougar still has deep feelings for the ex even though she knows that for him it is over.

Still it was good for the ego to have a young cute guy want to pursue me for the while he did, but eventually it would not be what the cougar is looking for in a life mate.  I have the feeling that this one, baby boy will eventually be back with his wife, his childhood sweetheart, I believe he is just going through a stage of sowing his wild oats.

Friday January 20th, a night of dancing at my favorite place, with my favorite band.  It is an interesting night as ex baby boy will be there with his love interest.  I decide that the course I will take is to stay out of there way.  The cougar dressed in short skirt, jacket, cfm shoes that accent her lethal legs, hair and makeup impeccably done by her darling daughter, I rock the club that night. So many guys trying to get my attention, the cougar is eating it all up.  Baby boy's friend ( now a potential N5) the one I thought so disrespectful is now laying it on thick, he is trying so hard, the legs and short skirt has him going, he keeps telling me I look so sexy, he is telling the singer in the band that I'm hot.  Silently I'm laughing, I tell him that all he wants is to get me in bed, and I also tell him it's never going to happen.  Still he tries to convince me that we would be fantastic in bed, I tell him it's because one always wants what is unattainable, I tell him I can't be had. The naughty in this cougar is putting him through the paces, dancing with him as only this sexy cougar can. He is just about dying, trying to get even a slightest kiss to my lips, which I gently turn my head when he tries.  I'm playing him, even though he is the type this cougar is usually attracted to.  As the night ends, he wants to drive me home, I tell him I have my own vehicle and I also drive my friend home, he tells me he will drive her home to.  This girl goes home with no one from the bar, so I give him my number to compromise and my girlfriend and I are on our way home.

We make one stop at 7-11 because I want to put some gas in the tank, when I get back in the vehicle my girlfriend is laughing she tells me you should have seen this guy in a van stop to let me cross as he starts to drive away, he is still looking and almost hits another car.  Yes it was a very good, good night, it felt good for the ego that this cougar can turn mens heads.  A thought comes to my mind, at one point during the evening I did look over at baby boy and thought "What did I ever see in him that I allowed him to purse me?", a nice guy yes, but definitely not this cougar's type, not a strong confident man that she needs.

The cougar has decided she is going in hibernation for the next 5 weeks before she heads down to Arizona.  She needs to focus on a strict diet and exercise regime and doesn't want any distractions, maybe even not a potential N5 but one never knows.....stay tuned....

I don't know what it is about this cougar that young men find attractive, N6 into the mix from the dating site.  He is only 41 years old and wants to pursue me, I tell him I'm heading down to Arizona soon and not into a relationship right now.  I will meet him, he likes to dance, he even suggest that we could take ballroom dance lessons together. The picture he produced of himself is nice, dark, handsome one never knows, it seems that there is a parade of young men coming my way nowadays perhaps I should date them and reconsider.

It's Tuesday January 24th, after a talk with one of my girlfriends, it seems there was a girl her daughter new who was out at a music fest.  She had one drink and went to a camp site to visit, well she didn't remember anything of the evening but woke up in the morning with blood around her.  It bothered her so much, not knowing what had happened that she went to a hypnotist and found out that she had been given a ruffie, and the hypnotist was able to determine who did it and when it happened, she also found out she was raped by two men.  I told my girlfriend I wanted the number of this hypnotist because I wanted to find out what happened to me the night my ex disowned me, he refused to tell me, and it's been on my mind since.  I need closure to this incident and hopefully I will be able to find out from my subconscious everything that happened night that I don't remember.

Wednesday January 25th, this dating site seems to be hopping now, there seems to be a message from someone new almost everyday.   N7 is an older gentleman and after chatting with him on the phone, he sounds down to earth and nice.  Although I still wonder what breaks up a marriage after 35 year together, it seems nothing is sacred anymore. I have also decided that N6 is too young for me, so I let the texting back and forth go slowly to the way side.

I end out going out dancing Friday night and who is there but N4 baby boy, without the new girl, I sure had him pegged sowing his wild oats.  I decide to chat with him at the end of the evening, he has this weird guy beside him, who puffs his chest out at me.  I'm laughing inside because he reminds me of a rooster.  His friend states he is heading over to another bar to get laid, I say under my breath, yes go.  N4 ask me what I think of the band and I tell him they are really good, lots of good dancing tunes.  He asks if I'm going to be there next Friday, I tell him I didn't think so, because the band playing is not so good, and I say goodbye and move back to my group of friends.  The evening was total fun, I get a good workout of shaking my booty all over the dance floor with my best girlfriend and a couple of guys.

Saturday, January 28th, one month till this cougar heads to Arizona, I decide to go out for lunch with N7.  We meet at the Olive Garden and have an enjoyable conversation.  Six degrees of separation, turns out I know this N7, I use to work with him when I was in my early 20's.  I knew his wife, she cut my hair for a time.  His is a nice looking man, and when lunch is over we walk out together, he hugs and kisses me on the lips, and I let him as he is leaving he tells me it up to me if I want to meet again, that I have his phone number.  As I walk away still laughing at the fact he is someone from my working past, I feel that I really don't want to pursue this one anywhere.  To me the past was laid to rest on New Years Eve, this cougar is moving on to bigger and better things.  Although honestly I still tend to revert back to missing my last lover.  It is hard to lay this one to rest, I can honestly say I truly loved him, but forever what reason the man upstairs deems him not to be mine. 

Continuing Saga of Online Dating Part II

Continuing saga of online dating......

It’s 2012; my past love has made it quite clear he didn’t love me back; he hasn’t made one move to talk or see me again.  On New Year’s Eve I made up a list of things I wanted to purge from my life for 2012, he was on the top of the list.  Strange thing was when I got home from my evening out; leaned over the kitchen sink with lighter in hand, light the paper but for some reason it didn’t burn all the way through.  The lighter had run out of fuel, so I quickly found another smaller one and proceeded to light the remaining un-burnt pieces.  Can anyone tell me why it was so hard to burn a few pieces paper?  Was it trying to tell me something?  It was like something on the piece of paper didn’t want to pass on from my life, but with patience I finally burnt all of it and then washed it down the sink. 

I did send him a text wishing him a Happy New Year and may all his dreams and wishes come true, but true to character he never replied back.  Some men just don't know how to remain friends with exes.   So now instead of wallowing in self pity, the cougar is made of stronger fabric than that, I start the endless parade of dating men from the current online dating site.

As I move towards finding the ‘one’ I will refer to each one with a number starting with N1.  Can anyone guess what number I’ll be up to when I do find the ‘one’?

It is Monday January 3^rd, a day I have off, N1 is meeting me outside the Museum of Man and Nature, a first date location for me that is new, but then to bring in the type of man one is looking for changes had to be made.  Since I have quit indulging in the spirits (alcohol) I have to find other innovated ways to see if someone is able to make me interested enough to pursue for another date. 

This gentleman states he is a successful professional who stays fit and active and maintains a very positive outlook on life. I He loves to travel and get off the beaten track whenever possible. He also states he can be quite adventurous and would like a partner to share things with and he cooks a bonus in a man.

So at the arranged time I meet him, not a bad looking man for an older person, 4 years older than me.  He pays and we enter the museum, wandering from exhibit to exhibit, talking a few times about the artifacts.  As we continue on, my pain between the shoulders is starting to make its self known, an injury left over from just before Christmas.  The conversation is light, but I’m finding that this really isn’t a good way to impress someone like me on a first meet.  The cougar is knowledgeable, but also craves excitement and going through a museum is not this fun loving woman’s cup of tea. 

We finally reach the end and he suggests going someplace for a glass of wine or coffee.  Well the wine is out, but I humour him all the while thinking I just want to head home as we make our way to a place close by that I’ve never been to but wanted to see the inside of, Sensi Wine Lounge.  All I can say is the powers that be are with me that day, the place is closed as is many places on this second day after New Years.  With that gift from above, I shake his hand and then give him a hug.   I always hug people when parting and he says he’ll call because we both work downtown, perhaps after work.  Note to self, don’t give out where you work in the future.

Tuesday January 3, 2011, enter N2, he is a late entry to the line up but after a telephone conversation with him on Sunday I want to meet to see if there is that ever elusive chemistry.  This date is simply for coffee or tea in my case at Tim Horton’s it’s early at 4:30 and I ensure I’m there about 10 minutes early.  As I’m picking out my apple cinnamon tea, there is a guy who came in paying for his coffee.  It’s him, he sent me his picture, so I approach him and we settle on a table by the window.

This guy states he is an active fun loving man who enjoys the outdoors, walking and going for dinner. He does enjoy sports watching and playing but walking is a passion of his and he loves to cook and BBQ. He enjoys all types of music except rap.

As we chat I feel that same comfortableness as I did on the phone with him.  He’s not a bad looking man, but don’t really know if I feel the chemistry there.  He talks about himself, his children and the fact that he is new to the dating site, me being the second one he has messaged.  He then allows me to talk about me, and I being me, tell him all about my life, including my recent breakup.  I’m honest if anything, he thinks I was drugged that night as well.  I guess everyone I talk to about that night of the breakup thinks I was drugged at the bar, now I know it’s the only reasoning.  He also ask if I’m still hung up on the past guy, he feels that it would not be in his interests to pursue if I’m still thinking of someone else.  I tell him I’ve purged him on New Year’s Eve, deep down I’m still thinking not, but perhaps this one can help me move on.

He states he finds me attractive, that we have lots in common and feels the elusive chemistry, and then adds he wants to take me to dinner Friday night, he wastes no time.  My feeling is that he is genuine and honest, so I quickly dismiss my usual Friday night out dancing with my gals and say yes.  To be continued......he calls me the next day stating could we go on Thursday instead as he forgot he was watching his grandson play hockey.  I tell him I have other plans but will let him know next week.

Thursday brings on N3 a skating date, but since the temperatures were way above the freezing point the skating canopy at the Forks was mush and roped off.  So my date suggested a walk along the river bank since it was a beautiful balmy winter evening.  Since he lived a little closer to The Forks and close to me, I offered to pick him up. 

During the ride to the forks we talk about where we grew up and I found out he grew up in the same area as me, although he was a little older, our paths never crossed.  He commented he like my GMC Jimmy he had one but wished he still had it.  We promptly found a parking spot and made our way down to the river to begin the walk.  Not far down the trail we stopped to look at what appeared to be ducks, but it was geese that had chose to stay behind, who knows why but it had seemed they missed their flight.  There was a young couple with their child taking a picture of them with their phone.  My date was a very talkative man and started talking to them about the geese and ducks being able to fly down to Minneapolis in a day.  He seemed to be a very knowledgeable man, and I was starting to become impressed.

As we walked he talked about his career in journalism and how he was writing a book.  Our walk took us up to the Legislative buildings where I did some talking about a water boat trip they offer at The Forks, guided with a man telling about the water levels of the two rivers during the 1950 to 1997 floods, and in particular my favourite about how the Golden Boy came to Winnipeg to sit atop the Legislative Building.  It was commissioned over in France just before World War I.  When it was finished and put onto the boat, the boat listed to one side due to the heaviness, so they had to break open and put it in the hull of the ship.  The ship started out for Canada but the war started and the ship was commissioned for the war.  When the war ended the ship was being dismantled when they found the Golden Boy in the bottom of it.  It was sent on its way to Canada and finally reached Winnipeg in time for the Legislative Buildings completion.

When our walk; which lasted about 40 minutes was completed we stopped to have coffee for him and tea for me.  He being a very talkative person and me the listener the subject now turned to online dating.  He said he had been on the site for about four years and I was only the fourth woman he had agreed to meet.  Then he went on to talk about his male friends mostly married didn’t want to do much but stay at home with their wives.  When they did venture out the wives would also call asking them where they were.  He said he was not good being around a woman’s friends, preferred not to, but didn’t have a problem with women being around men.  Then he asked me a question that made up my mind about him, he asked me “what does a man need a woman for”.  I was kind of thrown with that question, but decided it was better to left it unsaid.  I did retort back that when I went dancing my girlfriends I didn’t like to have a man around, because I don’t like to feel I have to babysit them.   After all it’s my night out with my gals.

Needless to say it was getting late, me being thankful for that, we were on our way with me dropping him off at his place, him saying something about getting together again, and me thinking no way in hell that would happen.  No wonder he has only had four dates, with a male macho attitude like that he can talk to the hand for the rest of his life, I want someone compatible who will share his life with me, not his friends.

So what does a cougar do on a Friday night, she heads to her favorite place, to dance the stress away.  While there I do my customary walk past the bar a few times, I like to see who is there sometimes when I’m not on the dance floor.  Each time I head past the bar, there are three guys at the end of it I sense trying to get my attention.  After the second time I sit down next to my girlfriend and she outright states, “You see that guy over there at the bar, the one with the leather jacket, well his eyes followed you not once but twice as you walked by all the way back here”.  I state “ hmmm really”, so being the femme fatale that I am, I decide to walk by again.

This time his friend catches my eye, I smile and his friend stops me to chat.  The object of my quest leans over and asks,” Was that you last week in a skirt”?  I laugh, feeling slightly flabbergasted as this guy is so good looking and tell him a prompt “yes”.  It was an opening I was looking for, and for the next three hours I stand there chatting to him, his brother and his friend.  At one point he asks me to dance and I’m very pleased as we head out on the dance floor and start dancing that he has rhythm.  Soon his friend is stating he will be leaving soon, I ask if he’s driving and he says he is, so I promptly grab and fill a glass full of water for him.  It was nice to be standing so close to the water for the evening because my glass was never empty. 

The most important topic of the evening centered on Arizona, the three of them might be down there at the same time as the Cougar. I ask his brother to dance to one of my favorite songs, and then I dance once more with him before the day has worn me in.  I tell him that I will be leaving for the night, he ask for my number but says he doesn’t have his phone on him, so I input his number and send him a text telling him he has mine now.  I give my customary hug and bid both brothers adios.

When I wake up in the morning, I see that he texted me in the wee hours asking if I was still up, since I was out later than normal, I wake up later than normal and send him a text back saying “I was up now lol”.  He texts back asking if I want to do something that day and I text back that I would like to go skating.  He use to play hockey when he was younger and this strange thought that lately I've met lots of jocks, I was never attracted to jocks growing up, and he still plays sometimes.  I’m thinking since I’m not a good skater he could teach me a few things and we could have a fun first date.  We decide on a time late afternoon and early evening.  This, by the way is N4, but he isn’t even on an online dating site a bonus.

I meet him Saturday at 4 pm on an outdoor rink in St Boniface.  Conversation is flowing so smoothly, my skating is wobbly at first, but with his hand I soon am skating not too bad around the rink.  I think I like this skating, it burns lots of calories and fun to boot.  But as everything, and my body telling me it’s time, skating ends after one hour.  We step inside and take off our skates and enjoy a cup of hot chocolate.  It’s time for him to go watch his football game and I just want to go home and chill for the evening.  As we walk out to the car, we turn to each other and kiss, soft lingering kisses, he is a good kisser and I tell him so.  He asks what I’m doing on Sunday, I tell him lots, but I could make myself free for the evening.  He tells me he’ll call me.

I call my girlfriends and tell them about my date, I’m smiling; he is so good looking and younger than me I know that.  I decide and tell them, I’m not doing no pursing, if he wants to date me, he will have to do the pursuing.  I hide my profile on the online dating site, until I see where this will lead, there is still N2 who wants to take me to dinner, but I’m almost certain that nothing would evolve from it.  Although I’m still undecided, I know I have to make a decision early because N2 said he had a good feeling about us, I didn’t tell him, that I really didn’t feel the same.  Still I'm not one to keep a man hanging on if I"m not interested in him, but I do have to weigh my options very carefully to ensure I find the right one.

Sunday he texts and we decide to go skating again later in the evening, after his football game we meet at the same place only this time the club is closed and we don’t want to put our skates on outdoors.  I suggest a game of pool and get on my iPhone for a place close by, the decision is a place at The Forks so off we go.  When we arrive, both pool tables are taken and a small Christmas party must have been Ukrainian lol was going on as well as Karaoke.  We spend the next three hours chatting about everything under the sun, he is such an easy going personality and I find we have so much to talk about and in common.  The evening ends, I have to work in the morning he has the day off, we kiss goodbye at our vehicles and are on our way.

When I get home, I text him thanking him for another wonderful evening, he returns the text telling me he thought so too.  Meanwhile I have a text from N2 wanting to take me out for supper on Tuesday, I answer him that I’m not sure if I’m available but will let him know on Monday.

Monday I decide I'll meet him but only for light appetizer's to see if there is something that wants to make me see him again....song "Colder Weather" runs through my mind.

At about 8 pm I receive a text from N4 and we continue with the texting back and forth for about two hours.  He is a funny guy and the conversation seems to flow really good, could be a potential 'one', but the Cougar has been burnt, she does have a trust issue with men and their motives, so I'll just let this play out and see what happens, no expectations.  I think I'll just play the part of the Cougar, after all he is ten years younger than me, perhaps I should just be a Cougar and see where it will lead.

Tuesday rolls in and I decide not to meet N2, a trip to the chiropractor for the shoulder blades has me running really late and I ask for a rain check.  Instead I head over to a girlfriends to help her out with a competition and actually have a glass of wine.  It's gossip night at her place and I'm just enjoying the camaraderie.  My phone rings and it's N4, I'm surprised as I really expecting his call, we chat for a little while and he tells me he'll call me the next day.

stay tuned.....